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If we’re told we’re an assetWhy are we treatedLike a problemAnd if you brake our dreamsDo our hearts not go to sleepLike a dump for broken dreamsIs how this country seemsSplinters of dreamsSo it feelsIf we’re always discouragedIf time for us can’t be affordedIf an open heartGets crushed downWhat then is rewardedIn this world inside a jarOur jobs are all we areYou are like a ghostIf you have noneWhen they say we have no useThey must be deaf and blindWhy should we take abuseI pay no mindIf everything’s perfunctoryOnly made half-heartedlyIf all is done by defaultWhat is done from the heartLike a dump for broken dreamsIs how this country seemsSplinters of dreamsSo it feelsHow come no one seesWe’re just categoriesWe live and dieBy rank
I am telling myself the story of my life, stranger than song or fiction. We start with the joyful mysteries, before the appearance of ether, trying to capture the elusive: the farm where the crippled horses heal, the woods where autumn is reversed, and the longing for bliss in the arms of some beloved from the past. I said 'Your daddy loves you'. I said 'Your daddy loves you very much'; he just doesn't want to live with us anymore'.The plane comes down behind enemy lines and you don't speak the language. A girl takes pity on you: she is Mother Theresa walking among the poor, and her eyes have attained night vision. In an orchard, drenched in blue light, she changes your bandages and soothes you. All day her voice is balm, then she lowers you into the sunset. Hers is the wing span of the quotidian angel, so her feet are sore from the walk to the well of human kindness, but she gives you a name and you grow into it. Whether a tramp of the low road or a prince, riding through Wagnerian opera, you learn some, if not all, of the language. And these are the footsteps you follow - the tracks of impossible love.12 days in Paris, and I am awaiting for life to start. In the lobby of the Hotel Charlemagne they are hanging photographs of Rap artists and minor royalty. All cigarettes have been air-brushed from these pictures, making everyone a liar, and saving no-one from their folly. As proud as Lucifer, I do nothing to hide my kerosene dress and flint eyes - which one steady look, are able to restore to these images their carcinogenic threat. So what if this is largely bravado ? I have only 12 days in Paris and I'm awaiting for life to start. I'm setting out my stall behind a sheet of dark hair, and you, the hostage of crazed hormones, will be driven to say: 'I am the next poet laurate and she is the cherry madonna, and all of the summer is hers.'At first I don't notice you, or the colour of your hair, or your readiness to laugh. I am tying a shoelace, or finding the pavement fascinating when the comet thrills the sky. Ever the dull alchemist. I have before me all the necesary elements: it is their combination that eludes me. Forgive me ... I am sleepwalking. I am jangling along to some song of the moment, suffering it's sweetness, luxuriating in it's feeble aproximation of starlight. Meanwhile there is a real world ... trains are late, doctors are breaking bad news, but I am living in a lullaby.You might be huddled in a doorway on the make, or just getting by, but I don't see it. You are my one shot at glory. Soon I will read in your expression warmth, encouragement, assent. From an acorn of interest I will cultivate whole forests of affection. I will analyse your gestures like centuries of scholars poring over Jesus'words. Anything that doesn't fit my narrow interpretation I will carelessly discard. For I am careless ... I'm shameless ... and - ('Mayday, Mayday, watch the needle leave the dial') I am reckless, I am telling myself the story of my life.Soon, I will make you a co-conspirator: if I am dizzy I will call it rapture; if I am low I will attribute it to your absence, noting your tidal effect upon my moods. Oblivious to the opinions of neighbours I will bark at the moon like a dog. In short, I'm asking to be scalded. It is the onset of fever.Yesterday they took a census. Boasting, I said 'I live two doors down from joy.' Today, bewildered and sarcastic, I phone them and ask 'Isn't it obvious? This slum is empty.'Repeat after me: happiness is only a habit. I am listening to the face in the mirror but I don't think I believe what she's telling me. Her words are modern, but her eyes have been weeping in gardens and grottoes since the Middle Ages. This is the aftermath of fever. I cool the palms of my hands upon the bars of an imaginary iron gate. Only by an extreme act of will can I avoid becoming a character in a country song: 'Lord, you gave me nothing, then took it all away.' These are the sorrowful mysteries, and I have to pay attention. In a chamber of my heart sits an accountant. He is frowning and waving red paper at me. I go to the window for air. I catch the scent of apples, I hunger for a taste, but I can't see the orchard for the rain.There are two ways of looking at this. The first is to accept that you are gone, and to light a candle at the shrine of amnesia. (I could even cheat). In the subterranean world of anaesthetics sad white canoes are forever sailing downstream in the early hours of the morning. 'Tell the stars I'm coming, make them leave a space for me; whether bones, or dust, or ashes once among them I'll be free.'It may make a glamorous song but it's dark train of thought with too many carriages.There is, of course, another way of looking at this: Your daddy loves you; I said 'Your daddy loves you very much; he doesn't want to live with us anymore.' I am telling myself the story of my life.By day and night, fancy electronic dishes are trained on the heavens. They are listening for smudged echoes of the moment of creation. They are listening for the ghost of a chance. They may help us make sense of who we are and where we came from; and, as a compassionate side effect, teach us that nothing is ever lost.So ... I rake the sky. I listen hard. I trawl the megahertz. But the net isn't fine enough, and I miss you - a swan sailing between two continents, a ghost inmune to radar.Still, my eyes are fixed upon the place I last saw you, your signal urgent but breaking, before you became cotton in a blizzard, a plane coming down behind enemy lines.
Useless waste of human flesh,Fucking everything you see.Body like an hourglass,But a soul just like a succubus.No, I will not fall victim to your disease,Or your hideous vagina trap.Like fucking a malady filled gangrenous wound,I want nothing to do with you.Love is dead instead,You'd rather give head.You stupid trick,I will end this.You're life is meaningless.Love is dead instead,You'd rather give head.Useless waste of human flesh.I will end this
I am the shadow, and the smoke in your eyesI am the ghost, that hides in the nightBoom-lay boom-lay, boom! (repeat)Wait, wait a minute take a step back,Gotta think twice before you react.So stay, stay a little while cause a promiseNot kept is the road to exileHey, what's the circumstance?You'll never be great without taking a chanceSo, wait you waited too longHad your hands in your pocketWhen you should've been gone.(Boom-lay boom-lay boom)One push is all you need(Boom-lay boom-lay boom)This is philosophy.(Boom-lay boom-lay boom)We watch with wounded eyes.(Boom-lay boom-lay boom)So I hope you recognize.Out on the front line, don't worry I'll be fineThe story is just beginningI say goodbye to my weakness, so long to the regretsAnd now I see the world through diamond eyesDamn, damn it all downTook one to the chest without even a soundso, what, what do you wantThe things you love or the people you hurtHey, it's like déjà vu suicidal maybe I got nothing to loseSo wait, it's the exception to the ruleEveryone of us is expendable(Boom-lay boom-lay boom)One push is all you need(Boom-lay boom-lay boom)This is philosophy.(Boom-lay boom-lay boom)We watch with wounded eyes.(Boom-lay boom-lay boom)So I hope you recognize.Out on the front line, don't worry I'll be fineThe story is just beginningI say goodbye to my weakness,So long to the regretsAnd now I know that I'm aliveOut on the front line, don't worry I'll be fineThe story is just beginningI say goodbye to my weakness so long to the regretsAnd now I see the world through Diamond Eyes(uuuuuuuuuuuuuh uuuuuh)Every night of my life I watch angels fall from the skyEvery time that the sun still setsI pray they don't take mineI'm on the front line, don't worry I'll be fineThe story is just beginningI say goodbye to my weakness so long to regretsOut on the front line, don't worry I'll be fineThe story is just beginningI say goodbye to my weakness so long to the regretsAnd now I know that I'm aliveOut on the front line, don't worry I'll be fineThe story is just beginningI say goodbye to my weakness, so long to the regretsAnd now I see the world through diamond eyesOut on the front line, don't worry I'll be fineThe story is just beginning(The story is just beginning)I say goodbye to my weakness,So long to the regretsAnd now I see the world through Diamond eyesBoom-lay boom-lay boom (repeat till the end)
How can we bridge the path from dark to lightIf we live like the rest. Can we portray his love?We are the WindowWhat we do is for youCan we be your hands?Burn these wallsLet your light shine through this veilBurn these walls Let your light shine throughWe are the WindowWe must set our own hearts Straight to lead the weakWe give ourselves to you To see the truth within in your handsOh God take it allFill my lungsGive me lifeWe were hollow menWe were hollow men Consume meI am choosing what I will let decideWho I will becomeWith all this shame pulling at my feetI will run to youWhat can I doTo make this wretch pureAll of meUse all of me for youWe must set our own hearts Straight to lead the weak into the promise landYou still Give us hopeThis is my fleshNothing more than a book Of redemption and regretsThis is my fleshNothing more than a book Of redemption and regretsBurn these wallsLet your light shine through this veilBurn these walls Let your light shine through
HEYYY!I'm leavin the same way I came inLookin forward but I can't see straightIt's just like I know where I'm goingIt's just like me to fool myself(I'm Right Here Bitch!)or(im what happends)Buried by the words of a liar(I'm Right Here.. BITCH!)Or(im what happends)But I'm alive and I'm still breathinWe're sane because of her tasteYou didn't say enough for one last timeMy mind plays it over and overSlow motionBut we're moving faster, moving fasterSo much furtherLet's not lose control(Light a match just to watch it burn)Struck(Light a match just to watch you burn)Where are you goin? How far?Where are you goin?(Let's give them HELL!)We're sane because of her tasteYou didn't say enough for one last timeMy mind plays it over and overSlow motionBut we're moving faster, moving fasterSo much furtherLet's not lose control(I'll bite the bullet)(Just to save myself) (Oh!)(Oh no, this ship is quickly sinking)(We gotta take control, gotta take control)(Oh no, this ship is quickly sinking)(We gotta take control, gotta take control)Slow motionNow we're moving faster, moving fasterSo much furtherNow we're moving faster, moving faster(I'll bite the bullet)
*lyrics*
Ahh, soul of mineAhh, soberAhh sold the mindAhh I'm so soberI know the wayAhh...stonedAhh, so it endsAhh oh stone soberAh, gimme that wine!Gimme that acid!And I wanna lose everything that's policing us, and then everything must begin!And I wanna do heroin!And I wanna do crack cocaine!And I wanna lose everything but release... Why don't you just:SMOKE THAT FUCKING WEED, BOY! DRINK THE WINE!
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